pimplywimp blog

way to go

2011-12-10T13:39:00.000-08:00

I am in the process of signing with a network on YouTube. I expect only wonderful things to come from it. I'll keep you updated.

Also, I made a cover of The Shins "New Slang" from their 2001 album Oh, Inverted World. I changed the lyrics a little and played it the only way I know how, not extremely well. The last "faired well", is now "farewell".

poke me on facebook

2011-11-02T16:36:00.000-07:00

Do you have a FaceBook page? I bet you do. What are your favorite features? Least favorite? Well, I was in a Michael Gallagher or TotallySketch interactive video about the website's Poke button. It has over 10 million hits and inspired an article from CNN. Also, please add my FaceBook fan page if you have an account.

near death & auditions

2011-09-15T21:30:00.000-07:00

Today I had a rare moment of road rage. It occurred on the 110 freeway, or more specifically the Arroyo Seco Parkway, which is the first freeway in the United States of motherfuzzing America. I'm also pretty certain the Parkway hasn't had any major renovations in my lifetime until this year, as part of Obama's Stimulus Package (not a sexual intercourse joke).

State funded workers changed the charming and historic wood and steel center dividers into concrete. I had always imagined the short wooden pillars one day becoming petrified, long after we abandoned our dependency on gasoline driven cars. Sadly, the new dividers now serve as another surface for vandalism and bad graffiti. Changes are necessary though and I still like Obama and Stimulus Packages (this is a sexual intercourse joke).

Anycrap, the onramps to the Parkway are stop signs with no room to gain any speed. You enter oncoming traffic at almost a complete zero. The speed limit in 1940 was 45mph or 70km/h. I will now use the metric system because I'm opposed to both imperialism and imperial units.

So I'm approaching the onramp, 20 meters away at a speed of 96km/h, and a car enters the Parkway. I slam on my brakes. My tires screech. Is everyone okay? My heart is beating, so yes. I can breathe still. I'm alive. That was a close one. I'm not even mad.

Then I catch up to the car. I see it's an EV, electric vehicle. That pisses me off. How can you be environmentally responsible but you can't double check before veering onto a freeway, on I what I would argue is the most dangerous onramp in all the United States of motherfuzzing America?

Still not in road rage mode, I pursue the car and almost miss my next exit. After I pull alongside the EV, I scope out the driver and his passenger and notice the old dude's rear view mirror. It's totally off kilter. It's literally at 45 degrees. I begin to yell. I follow him and glare as their car exits the freeway.

I arrive minutes later to help audition girls for a new horror web series I will star in for Daily Motion directed by Jake Barsha. It went well. I had to yell at a number of girls and a lot of them cried. I felt bad after. I gave one a high five. I made sure to tell them have a great day. I grabbed a tissue for one from another room.

Just who will get the part, I don't know. Auditioning is a strange process from both sides. A high percentage of the girls did a very good job. A few, not so well. A couple just seemed right for the part. I think there's a lot of luck involved, although I think we predominantly make our own luck.

Oddly enough, I will probably cut someone off on the freeway within the next couple months or do something equally as negligent. I can only hope the outcome is the same or better and somehow a little luck is involved.

The photograph above is an elevated bicycle path that was in the nearby area before the Parkway was built. How awesome would it be if bicycle paths were built like this again? If you use your luck, and you can make anything happen.

drunk and referential u&i.69

2011-04-29T13:30:00.000-07:00

I made a song using a loop I devised from Aimee Mann's "That's Just What You Are" from her 1995 album I'm With Stupid.

I expect to make more of these songs where I sample my favorite artists. Maybe I'll release a "mixtape" of them in the future.

0s & 1s has been completed

2011-03-17T14:51:00.000-07:00

A few years ago I submitted myself for the casting of an independent film called 0s & 1s. The director, Eugene Kotlyarenko, thought I had an interesting take on a character, but didn't think I was right for the part. He had me prepare and audition for a different role. After I read for that role, he changed his mind again and had me read for yet another role. The role was for Cole, a gutter punk, and it was larger than the first two.

Fast forward three years and the film is complete. The film took a long time in post because as Ronnie Scheib describes in his Variety review the "high-concept indie 0s & 1s treats the image like a giant computer screen, which helmer Eugene Kotlyarenko and his special effects/animation team fill with competing graphics, as windows, text messages, alerts, chats and apps fractionalize, interrupt and deconstruct the ongoing action."

A Village Voice review by Andrew Schenker draws a comparison to auteur Ingmar Bergman's Persona (1966). Personally, I think this is a film that could be studied in University film schools and I am looking forward to Eugene's next high-concept film project.

Also the film's soundtrack is shocksome. It includes Ariel Pink, Dum Dum Girls, No Age, Wavves, and many more.

The film will be playing in Brooklyn, New York from March 18-24 at reRun Gastropub Theater. Tickets are $5 and can be purchased here.

i am a warlock now

2011-03-03T02:10:00.000-08:00

So my friend Jason Carmody, whom I attended UC Santa Cruz with, fell in love with Charlie Sheen's call into Alex Jones' radio show and wanted me to set pieces of it to music. After I told him it was a funny idea but didn't act upon it, he made the song and had me sing the chorus for it. We discussed some video ideas, but I was skeptical about the quality of a music video without it's singer, in this case, Charlie Sheen. I knew "no" would not appease Jason, so I started watching every Sheen interview I could.

Suddenly it dawned on me. I said "winning" to myself and it really sunk in. Maybe I could do a Charlie Sheen impression? I took off the headphones I was wearing, walked up to Jason who was sitting on a chair on his balcony overlooking traffic on Hollywood's 101 freeway, and immediately launched into a frightening Charlie Sheen monologue. He absolutely loved it. One sleepless night later and we had our unscripted parody, ripe with improvisation and insanity.

facebook fanpage

2010-10-19T17:21:00.000-07:00

I literally just saw my FaceBook fan page has 500 likes. That's cool! Wanted to let you know that I plan to put exclusive content on it. Why? Because I want to give you incentive to click the like button and I want you to feel privileged for having clicked that like button. For instance, two weeks ago the Comedy Challenge was only uploaded to the fan page. That being said, the Challenges will resume on YouTube every Thursday.

challenges rolling out

2010-09-27T12:08:00.000-07:00

I have made myself an extremely busy person and am working harder than I have in a very long time on my YouTube videos. So far the response has been great! That's encouraging because if I didn't get any feedback from you, there would be no point in putting a new video up each week. I offer a thank you.

In the future I would like to do more collaborations. Sure, I have been in other people's videos, but I haven't had many YouTubers on my channel. I will change that. Below is an appearance on ShaneDawsonTV and my new challenges.

comedy challenge thursdays kick off

2010-09-13T17:33:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was on a shoot with Shane Dawson and Michael Gallagher. It's going to be an epic music video satire with many talented YouTubers. I would tell you more but I would probably be killed.

Also, I have begun my Comedy Challenge Thursdays. I chose the first challenge from FaceBook, where Jordan wrote on my status update: "Where's Waldo...but he's in denial about being found!". Guess that mean you better join my FaceBook Fan Page and contribute!

I have already chosen my challenge for next week. It involves a recording studio, so be excited!

comedy challenge comedy chomellengy

2010-09-03T08:59:00.000-07:00

If you have seen DeStorm or CharlieIsSoCoolLike on YouTube you know that they make videos where their subscribers and twitter followers challenge them. Like them I am going to make a Comedy Challenge series with a new video every Thursday. Now let me tell explain how these other YouTubers challenge videos work.

CharlieIsSoCoolLike's challenges are more like dares. For instance, he's painted himself purple, dyed his hair red, and learned to juggle. My favorite of his challenge series is when he was asked to make a song using only voice and everyday household items as instruments.

DeStorm's challenges are limited to his music and rapping. For instance, he's had to make a song with a pretty girl, rapping from the point of view of an inanimate object, and rapping using movie titles. My favorite is when rapped while skydiving.

So the moral of the story is, you can now challenge me and whose ever challenge inspires me the most I will choose and complete. My challenges will be limited to comedy videos, but if CharlieIsSoCoolLike challenges were my own they'd be to make a comedy sketch about hair dying, a purple person, juggling, or make a funny song with household items. If DeStorm's challenges were mine they'd be to make a comedy sketch with a pretty girl, as an inanimate object like an annoying orange, with dialogue using movie titles, or a comedy sketch where I skydive.

Now please challenge me and be imaginative! Make me do sketches in different genres. Make me do something so hard that I am mad at you. Just kidding I could never be mad at you! I love you!

maryland film festival

2010-04-30T14:08:00.000-07:00

I'm happy to announce the feature film 0s & 1s, which I have a role in, will have its World Premiere at the Maryland Film Festival. The film is from first time writer/director Eugene Kotlyarenko and plays on May 8th and my birthday May 9th. That's a pretty nice gift. If you'd like, leave me a birthday message in the comments! I'd love it.

Here's how J. Scott Braid from the Maryland Film Festival describes the film: "0s & 1s is a comedy that tells a simple story in a wholly new and visually compelling way. Recognizing that our lives are increasingly centered around computers and the language of computer use, 0s & 1s uses our familiarity with that language as a platform for telling a story.

James Pongo ( Morgan Krantz) has everything going for him -- a good job, a busy social life, a love interest -- that is, until his laptop disappears. After getting wrecked at a friend’s house party and passing out, James wakes up to find that his laptop is gone, and his computer-dependent life begins to unravel.

The entire movie appears on our screen as though on a laptop running on a fictional operating system. The screen bursts with chat bubbles, system-warning windows, MP3 applications, email messages, web browsers, and anything else you can think of that might pop-up on your laptop monitor. It is an approach to filmmaking that is totally fresh, and provides a real treat for the eyes."

david lynch & crispin glover

2009-11-14T10:32:00.000-08:00

Okay, so we got to Episode 5 of David Lynch & Crispin Glover's Big Box Office Blockbuster and we plan to move forward with more. We finally got our credits for it up on IMDB, which is particularly sweet for me because it's my first writing credit. The show also led to a cameo in a couple videos with The Station, where I got to work with LisaNova and KassemG, two comedians on YouTube that I really admire.

Aslo, I got sick and started googling myself, as if that is a cure. Everything I found actually made me a little more sick. Anyway, I did find a review for the show at Film Threat, a subversive webzine about independent film. I like the part where they say "Ryan Reyes finds more Crispin than the man himself could ever channel.". I also like how Matthew Sorrento, the site's editor, seems to understand that we are big fans and not merely trying to make fun of two of our favorite artists.

michael jackson memorial

2008-12-30T15:52:00.000-08:00

Although the media has gone way overboard with coverage of Michael Jackson, he will be remembered as one of the greatest entertainers of all time and a massively important cultural icon. I was lucky enough to win tickets to the event. Besides a media frenzy I didn't really know what to expect. It ended up being a surreal, amazing, and a sad experience. Definitely something I will never forget.

As a child I remember imitating his incredible dance choreography as Thriller dominated airwaves. I remember when his hair caught on fire. When he started to wear a glove. Watching Captain Eo at Disneyland in 3D the summer it came out. When his new music videos were television events. When his every move was scrutinized. The horrible allegations. Buying HIStory the day it came out with my best friend while girls laughed at us.

Michael truly was an inspiration for me, and though I partook in the what was almost an entire genre of Michael Jackson jokes, I couldn't wait to see what he was going to do next. Indeed, through it all I was always hoping for his comeback when he would amaze us all again. He is gone but his music and influence remain. We love you Michael! RIP.

Here is a video I made with Totally Sketch about the Michael Jackson Memorial.

Here is my tribute in the only way I know how. As Johnny Cash doing a cover of "Bad" of course.

film festival & smp films vid

2008-12-10T17:28:00.000-08:00

Here is a video I acted in for Cory "Mr. Safety" Williams. You probalby know who is if you are a fan of YouTube.

Also, I went to Italy because a film I am in and edited, Parade, was invited
to the 26th annual Torino Film Festival. Beside that, Things You Don't Tell (the first movie I acted in) is TRULY AVAILABLE on NetFlix, Amazon, & BestBuy.com.

so little time...

2008-09-30T14:40:00.000-07:00

I haven't registered to vote yet. Have you? I'm not voting for the ticket with the MILF. Sure she's cute and I like her hair and glasses, but as soon as she tries to communicate everything around me dies. I'm talking about appetites, house plants, etc. In my view, McCain uses hatchets and Obama is a surgeon with a scalpel. Can't wait for the comedy that will be the Vice Presidential Debates!

Albert turned down appearances on America's Got Talent and Late Night with Conan O'Brien. He doesn't particularly want to be known only for his Spit Art, or be exploited by big corporate television conglomerates. The O'Brien Show wanted him to draw a cartoon version of Conan which totally negated his artistic integrity. Albert says, and I agree, he would be much better suited for an interview by Charlie Rose.

The second film I starred in, Parade, won the Audience Choice Award at the Washougal International Film Festival, its first festival appearance.

The first film I starred in, Things You Don't Tell was supposed to be for sale and released on Netflix. Apparently, the DVDs haven't even been produced!?! I don't have a copy of my own and doubly frustrated by that and announcing it to my all my e-friends when it doesn't yet exist. I offer my apologies and hope you still are interested when it is finally released.

first movie on netflix

2008-08-20T16:49:00.000-07:00

Hope you had a great summer. What did you do? I just got back from Yosemite and am in San Francisco now.

The first movie i acted in, Things You Don't Tell is finally available for rent on Netflix. So if you can, please watch it and then write to me!!! It's available for purchase at bestbuy. com and amazon. com.

Also, I recently wrapped my 4th feature called 0’s and 1’s.. It ought to be really good. My third, Eugene, has just finished post-production. The second Parade will be screened at The Washougal International Film Festival in Washougal, WA Thursday, August, 21st 2008 at 10PM. If you have any questions, let me have them...

when the earth goes quake

2008-07-31T11:45:00.000-07:00

It was a rather hot day. A dip in the pool would have been nice. My teenage cousin Brian and I were outside cleaning up from a party. Spilled candy from a pinata, bottles and cans, plates with the remains of half eaten tacos. Suddenly, the house began to shake and the mobile home began to rattle loudly. It's pretty frightening at first when you don't know what's happening, but being outside is fairly safe. It lasted pretty long or at least seemed to. Long enough for my brother Albert, who got woken up, to run outside screaming and completely naked. Bewildered, Brian and I looked at him and then looked at each other. Everyone was stunned. I imagine even nearby birds had a laugh at that moment.

The film Parade I am in, about a rite of passage during young adulthood, has been accepted into the Washougal International Film Festival. Also, the first film I acted in, called Things You Don't Tell is available on DVD at Amazon.com. More on these developments later...

the color green

2008-06-11T14:57:00.000-07:00

More on that color later. First remember this is not a political blog, but politics is an inescapable part of life and during my lifetime elections have only grown in importance. This year's election is incredibly important, and has a chance to be monumental, so vote. John Cusack has something he would like to add.

music: She & Him are, the actress with a cool name, Zooey Deschanel and indie musician, M. Ward. Their debut album Volume One is both spectacular and devastating. The songs are heavily indebted to country and The Beatles' special brand of pop. This is never more clear than on the cover of The Beatles' very own "I Should Have Known Better". My personal favorite, "I Was Made For You", sounds like an oldie produced by Phil Spector and his wall of sound.

dvd: Control is a biopic about Ian Curtis, the lead singer of the band Joy Division. The film is shot beautifully in black and white. A must for aspiring rock stars and music fans. After Ian's suicide at 23, his band mates went on to form New Order.

The color green is a color I like. The grass. The leaves. The color is also a catch phrase nowadays for big business to cash in on environmental issues. Maybe that's a cynical viewpoint. I truly hope companies that are going "green" make an impact on the world. Now I happen to believe Global Warming is real, but regardless of where you stand on that issue, the environment is of the utmost importance. I live in Los Angeles and if you have been, you know about the smog. I'd argue it's never a good in Los Angeles because of it. Well, blue is another color I like. Blue skies on mars was suggested in the classic Total Recall. Well how about blue skies in Hollywood?

one task at a time

2008-06-03T15:19:00.000-07:00

Everyone knows it is best to do one task at a time. Before you use the restroom for number one, you must drink water. So be extra careful to focus when drinking water. Personally, i don't drink soda or coffee.

website: An Australian guy who was recently left by his wife wants to change his entire life to help cope, so he's auctioning it off. Even his friends and job. i love Australians! Getting to the point, I can't sell my whole life, but I got some burnt toast and a few problems I'd like to auction off. Anyone?

music: The National are from Ne York. They are a great band. I fell in love with the song "Fake Empire".

dvd: Lake of Fire is a really hard hitting and graphic documentary about abortion issues in America and the problems that arise from them. I agree with Noam Chomsky on this issue, who is interviewed in the film. What's your opinion?

pimplywimp: Albert had a show at Dirty Pilot. They have a wonderful online gallery of his work. Here's a direct quote from them: "We are thrilled to be showing Albert's work this month!! Dirty Pilot has published a 32 page 4-color zine to commemorate this show."

My video "LisaNova Naked by 2013? McCain Ad Parody" got featured in YouTube's comedy section. I think that's cool.

2008 begins

2008-01-17T08:57:00.000-08:00

With a bang and a ricochet. Soon I will post the trailer for the film I starred in called Parade. The Parade website explains the film and includes many photos. If you are interested in seeing the film or have any feedback, please leave a comment.

Here are a couple links of interest...Obviously people like to play with a drum machine. If you are a fan of mashups then visit this The Kleptones for free full album downloads.

Albert has a new art show called Something Wicked in San Francisco at Ampersand International Arts. This is his artist statement for the show: "I was born in Los Angeles, California in 1971 and currently reside there where I am trying to make it as an artist. I show and sell my work in both L.A. and San Francisco, at galleries I trust. I guess my art is a form of Pop Humanism or maybe even Folk, being that I am a mother folker. My work is about my life and the meaningfulness and meaninglessness of my uniquely American experience. I attempt to capture and reveal beauty by commenting on culture, politics, and religion. Ignorance is bliss. I am a people person and enjoy entertaining people, although pissing them off can be fun too. If I cannot get a positive reaction I know I can get a negative one rather easily. I love to draw and cannot hold down a real job, so please buy my artwork. Drive safely and have a good night."

2007 in review

2007-11-30T18:32:00.000-08:00

Anybody have any ideas for a list of the most goodest bestest viral videos of 2007? My choices include Will Farrell's "The Landlord", Miss South Carolina, Tay Zonday's "Chocolate Rain", Chris Crocker's "Leave Britney Alone", SNL's "Dick In A Box", Dramatic Chipmunk, and 2Girls1Cup (this one is definitely not for everyone). Some of these were popularized with remixes and reactions that created a cultural phenomenon and made the videos much more fun. What videos do you think I neglected?

I just finished acting in my third feature film. I play a heroin user who sells himself to feed the addiction. Ought to be dark, provocative, and interesting. More word on that as it's received. As for Albert, another great art show. And yeah 2007 was amazing!

what's up?

2007-10-08T23:18:00.000-07:00

Hello! Hope you had a great summer. I most certainly have; with plenty of friends, family, and tavel. I edited a feature film that I star in and found out that my first feature film, Things You Don't Tell, will have distribution in Australia, Brazil, Greece, and South Africa. Also, I starred in a pilot which may be available on iTunes soon...

Albert has been busy making art. He is on a DVD that is now available on Netflix, though it's admittedly not his best interview. He was recently featured on the popular blog Daily Candy.

In video news, Albert's Spit Art was featured on a program about web videos on CNN. It was also featured on the pilot to the CW's new show about web videos called Online Nation which includes our friend Stevie Ryan as a host. Episodes are available at the CW website.

Although Ryan hasn't made any videos in a while, a video he edited for his work, the hilarious and entertaining, GoPotato.tv was featured on YouTube. The Inappropriate Yoga Guy has 1.8 million hits and even inspired a New York Times article. The writer/star is friend Avi Rothman, who you might recognize from our collaboration, Holy Sh!t. Don't fret, school's almost over. Love, Ryan.

art show & news

2007-05-27T00:00:00.000-07:00

Albert is having an art show in South Pasadena at Bent with new drawings, paintings, and prints. If you can join us, please do. It's going to be fun!

He aslo recently had his artwork appear in the magazines Swindle and Chicano Art Magazine.

And then there was his appearance on Jimmy Kimmel Live doing Spit Art which earned him a nomination for the first annual YouTube Video Awards.

Ryan has been busy finishing reshoots on his second feature film, Parade which will be ready for festivals in August. He has also been busy making videos which have recently been featured on YouTube, MySpace, Veoh, & LiveVideo.

art show & online videos

2007-03-09T14:47:00.000-08:00

It's been too long, so without further adieux...Albert is having an art show near downtown L.A. at Show Cave with new drawings, paintings, prints, and video work. The show will also include video work by his brother Ryan and the talented Stevie Ryan.

Staying on the topic of videos, Albert's Spit Art video was featured on BoingBoing and CollegeHumor, while Ryan's videos were recently featured on MTVu and MySpace.

Pimplywimp recently reached 4,000 subscribers on YouTube while the videos, YouTube: The Movie and Spit Art, each have a million hits. Thanks to everyone who subscribes, watches, and leaves comments on the videos. It means a lot to us and is much appreciated.

spit, a great idea?

2006-12-17T23:59:00.000-08:00

Happy Holidays!!! It's been a great year for both Albert and myself. We are very thankful for everyone who has sent us nice comments and emails. The upcoming year is going to be exciting for us both. Albert will have art shows in Philadelphia and Berlin. My second feature will be finished with post production and be ready for film festivals. There is also some top secret stuff going on that will be sure to entertain you.

Please read Albert's article in The New York Times Magazine's 6th Annual Year In Ideas. You may have to sign up and login before you can read it.

ryan stars in two feature films

2006-06-27T12:42:00.000-07:00

Ryan's recent film news includes a month long journey to Utah to shoot his second feature, the independent film Parade, directed by Brandon Cahoon. He plays the main character, Dean Barrett, a high school student who, through countless adventures and misadventures, tries to make sense of young adulthood. More info to follow.

His first feature, the independent film Thing's You Don't Tell is currently seeking distribution and hitting the festival circuit. For more info, please visit the website.

Ryan also recently starred in two short films, The Key and Cool Jerks. the latter of which was featured in print, Rolling Out Magazine, and at the Independent Black Film Festival & Noir Film Festival.

first fan mail story

2006-06-27T12:41:00.000-07:00

this was my original post on January, 27 2004:

I have received my first fan mail. To show my appreciation here are the excerpts from the lovely Whitney: "Hey!!! omg ur so fukin hot!!! i want you like so bad. But anyways i thik thats awsome about the cd thing!!! i would give u my address in like omg a total second!! lmao u can have my phone # to lol im so funny!!! well anyways i just I wanted to let you know! lol bye!!!!!"

Curious, I enquired the identity of my first loyal fan and received this reply: "lol oh im sorry me and a friend were doin this gay report thing for chemistry about Catnip. And one of the things we had to do were find out if Catnip was ok for humans. So i was on ask.com and typed "catnip for humans" and i got to ur web thingy me and a friend were just lettin ya know u were a cutie sorry, Bye!!"

I then asked if I could post the e-mail: "lmao!!!!! that'd be great!!!!!!!!!! omg id piss my pants that'd be so funny!!!!lmao and we did get an A++!!!"

So you see, youth of America, the moral of the story is...View this website and your grades will instantly improve. Thank you Whitney for your show of support.

this was second original post on Febraury 4, 2004:

So, after I posted my number one fan's e-mail, there were dire consequences: "lmao that was great. everyone was laughin bout it!lol but my b/f happened to see it! lol."

Just how powerful is the internet? Well, apparently when in my hands, strong enough to destroy love: "oh i got in lost of trouble he broke up with me lol cuz he said i didnt tel him about it and that he would never do that to me. lol oh well! to bad for him."

Great, pimplywimp has ruined it's only fan's love life. I should put that on my resume! All apologies Whitney.

welcome to pimplyblog

2006-06-24T22:51:00.000-07:00

this is our new blog to learn about the brothers (albert & ryan). where they've been. where they are. where they are going. or anything else that may be of interest. goodies, links, etc.